T
Tara Collette
My Mindboom experience - 14 months ongoing
My Mindboom experience after 14 months and 45-ish treatments in their program After a brief interview I was accepted into their program I liked my clinician but it took 3 months and 1800-ish for her to consider my dosage as dialed in in reality I capped out at their 1200mg mark so she called it good enough Their programs for anxiety self-love depression etc are terrible The recordings are read by someone who had clearly never done that sort of thing before They were awkward not engaging and monotone and the info itself was not really inspiring I felt like I had to listen to them because I d paid for it My integration coach was also absolutely useless She asked questions I wasn t sure I understood and I was always concerned I d answer incorrectly somehow and she d boot me from the program because I wasn t making enough progress I also hadn t experience anything at all at this point so I felt like she wanted me to pretend I was having experiences I wasn t It just amped up my anxiety Lastly the music they provide on Soundcloud is electronic and weird or like day spa pan flute and they don t tell that without a Soundcloud membership it will interrupt your music stream with a sudden loud obnoxious ad randomly which will freak you out The treatment itself never produced a feeling of using hallucinogens At the final 1200mg dosage I felt like I d taken pain meds and when I moved my head it took a second for the world to catch up with it They also provide an anti-nausea med so you don t vomit I have done psychedelics in the past and myself and everyone I ve ever spoken with who has done both all say that this absolutely NOT like a hallucinogen Mostly I d say I just got lost in deep thoughts Each session consistently lasted 20 minutes before feeling like it had worn off and I was no longer dizzy Very rarely I still felt a little dizzy or very slightly nauseous after but not often I never once felt like I needed someone with me or checking in on me I never felt like if I drank water beforehand I would feel like I might pee myself while laying down that s supposedly a thing Others also agreed with all of this Depending on how much I d prepared is what I would get out of the session If I were super mindful of how I were feeling not in the midst of anxiety or depressive episode and I set clear and specific intentions I would come away feeling good and positive typically If I weren t in a great place and didn t meditate beforehand or bother to journal I d usually come away feeling like I d wasted time though I did always keep in mind the neuroplasticity so I know it was doing something After a year and a lot of hard work outside of Mindbloom I can say that my anxiety and C-PTSD symptoms have improved Whether Mindbloom had any real part in this is harder to say I did start to phase it out towards the end because I noticed that even if I hadn t had any anxiety for weeks I would get anxiety for 3-4 days straight every single time I took it beginning the night of the treatment so it was absolutely the catalyst Do you want to do a drug that is going to cause the very thing you re looking to eradicate Me neither I paid for the last program but I stopped halfway through because I just didn t feel like I could honestly say that it was working any longer Since I stopped treatments in January I ve not had any real issues that would make me believe I should still be doing it My anxiety is low I m not depressed unless I ve had a really challenging week and I still get C-PTSD triggered just as much as I ever did only I use newly acquired coping skills to process each experience instead of trying to rewire my brain using medication Bottom line Did it help I believe it did but only because I had convinced myself it had to I thought it was my last hope after a great deal of traditional medical care had not been successful However once I began to work through my trauma and triggers in earnest I believe that was the real factor in making progress towards recovery and taking back control of my life I think I spent way too much money on what now feels like a placebo but if it actually increased my neuroplasticity it wasn t a total waste Would I recommend it Probably not Not unless you have a lot of disposable income 750-ish every 6 weeks and are actively daily working towards strengthening your mental health on your own as well It s certainly not the miracle drug they try to advertise Hope someone finds this helpful and good luck to everyone on their personal journey